MESSAGES

[kingmakereffect]

If you have something to ask the Kingmaker about over the phone, this is where it goes! The Kingmaker will answer the phone as soon as he's available. There isn't an option to leave a message on his voicemail, but the Kingmaker will take your calls at almost any hour of the day.

Your smartphones will only connect to the Kingmaker. There is no option to dial a number, instead it will connect automatically to his phone.

Comments are screened for privacy; no listening in on each other's private conversations without permission, after all.

Comments

[captainobnoxious]

Unless someone manages to actually make their way in there with you to kill your smart ass. Right? Or is that like, a guarantee you'll be fine?

[kingmakereffect]

It's a guarantee I won't die to any disease, at least.

Though there is a rule in place about harming me, remember?

[captainobnoxious]

I do. But who's actually going to listen to that once they've got you in their hands, huh? It's more like a courtesy to ask and then clock you.

[Which she'd do. She'd absolutely ask to fight him and, if accepted, get ready to put a knife through his eye.]

[kingmakereffect]

Well yes, I figure you all want a piece of me. But if you attack me without permission... well, the rule is in place for a reason.

[captainobnoxious]

For our own protection, yeah yeah, we've seen that much. Though how strong are you really if you have to have all this space between us and can only kill us if we're sleeping?

... Or want it, in the bird's case. I hope he was tasty at least. Can't say I know much more if you'd still blow up whoever was in the kitchen at the time, awake or not.

[kingmakereffect]

I didn't eat him, that's gross.

[JEEZ SIGRUN]

You're not getting an answer about how strong I am. But you knew that already, didn't you?

[captainobnoxious]

Well, you should've! That's a waste of a perfectly good bird if you didn't! I mean, talking aside, he's still just a bird!

[... She seemed genuinely upset by that. Ahem.]

But I ask a lot of questions I don't expect an answer out of, yeah. It's always fun to see which ones get a hit and which ones miss, though for this one I'm just gonna assume you're the type of person who stays in the corner during a fight.

[kingmakereffect]

[BUT THE KING, SIGRUN.........]

That's not important for you to know. Maybe it will be at some point, but for now you're not getting an answer.

[captainobnoxious]

[MORE LIKE A KING FEAST!!]

You know, I've gotta wonder how many of the "important later" questions you'd answer now. I mean, I can't remember any of them, but still. Maybe there'd actually be something new to tell everyone.

[kingmakereffect]

Maybe. But if you want to be honest, I don't remember all of the questions you've asked me anyway.

[captainobnoxious]

I've asked you that many, huh. Do you mind it?

[kingmakereffect]

No, I don't. I'm sometimes baffled by the questions you all ask me, but I don't mind it.

[captainobnoxious]

Okay, so, without naming names -- which you won't anyway, because all these talks are private or whatever -- what's the weirdest question you've been asked?

[There's gotta be at least one that's stuck out to him.

... Besides her own...]

[kingmakereffect]

[...]

Someone kept insisting that knowing the weather outside was important.

I know it doesn't sound that weird, but of all things to ask when you're trapped in a place like this, why would the weather outside be a concern?

[captainobnoxious]

No, no, that is pretty weird. I mean, what's even the point, right?

[...]

Thaaat said, though, can you actually see what the outside's like right now? I'm kind of curious what season it is. It'll help in deciding if my birthday's soon or not.

[kingmakereffect]

I'm afraid I can't tell you that. When is your birthday anyway?

[captainobnoxious]

The summertime! August 4th to be exact. I was born for troll hunts, see, wouldn't be surprised if my mom went right into labor during one.

[Is it honestly any surprise at all that she's a Leo.]

[kingmakereffect]

I see. Well, you never know, maybe I'll let you know later if your birthday's coming up.

[captainobnoxious]

[!!!]

Would you? That'd be great! Then everyone has to give me presents and maybe you can even come down and let me land a hit on you!

[kingmakereffect]

Don't get too carried away. And I said maybe, so don't get your hopes up.

[captainobnoxious]

[But don't you just love how excited and happy you make her sometimes, Kingmaker?]

When's your birthday?

[kingmakereffect]

[oh sigrun..........]

That's not really important.

[captainobnoxious]

You asked me, I ask you. It's a fair trade. Even season'll do.

[kingmakereffect]

...Winter. I guess I can tell you that I'm an aquarius, since Dedicated asked about that.

Ask him if you don't understand.

[captainobnoxious]

I will. Because I don't. Sounds fishy though.

[No, Sigrun. The one after that is the fish.]

I can so believe that you're a winter baby though. We're like, exact opposites! Why'd the shrimp want to know anyway?