MESSAGES

[kingmakereffect]

If you have something to ask the Kingmaker about over the phone, this is where it goes! The Kingmaker will answer the phone as soon as he's available. There isn't an option to leave a message on his voicemail, but the Kingmaker will take your calls at almost any hour of the day.

Your smartphones will only connect to the Kingmaker. There is no option to dial a number, instead it will connect automatically to his phone.

Comments are screened for privacy; no listening in on each other's private conversations without permission, after all.

Comments

[captainobnoxious]

I won't try for round four yet and I know that. You're a stubborn ass, remember? Even if we were flesh and blood you wouldn't change at all.

[She sounds so sure of that.]

[kingmakereffect]

Trust me, I have no interest in seeing what Meteoric gets up to in his spare time. I'm not interested in whatever it is robots and humans do together either.

You'll get used to the non-answers eventually. Maybe. I'm surprised you haven't yet.

[kingmakereffect]

Of course I wouldn't. I'm always going to be like this.

[He sounds thoughtful, but as usual he's not going to talk about it.]

[captainobnoxious]

[... Okay but now she really wants to know about his family. The chance of him talking about that is like, a high zero. You can practically hear the debate in the following silence.]

... So. How've you been? Sleeping well? Keeping yourself fed? Things like that.

[penduli]

I seem to recall mentioning I liked dealing with open, honest people. [ ...a sigh. ] But I know you're not either of those.

[ ...why did he ever agree to this? Oh, right, information. ...information he has to play twenty questions for anyway. ]

I heard you're not from this world originally either—Miss Sigrun mentioned it before. Have you been here much longer than us?

[kingmakereffect]

I've been fine. You really don't need to ask questions about me, you know.

...Though I guess if I was having problems that would make things more difficult for you all.

[good job, kingmaker]

[kingmakereffect]

Does it really matter? I'm not sure what you're hoping to get out of a question like that.

[what a pain in the ass, sorry black]

[penduli]

[ he did this to himself ]

I was just wondering if you'd know if there were people before us here, that's all. There's no reason to get so defensive.

[captainobnoxious]

Right. If you died, we'd eventually starve. And that's not fun for anyone, not even the robot who it doesn't apply to.

[Because that would mean his important people would eventually starve and honestly that's Horrible.]

So if you have any health issues or anything at all, speak now so that if those alarms go off again we can either just shrug our shoulders at what's you probably falling asleep at your station or call and see if you're still alive.

[guess which party she was in. guess.]

[kingmakereffect]

Why do you want to know?

[kingmakereffect]

I don't have any health problems. You won't have to worry about me suddenly dying or anything.

[captainobnoxious]

Unless someone manages to actually make their way in there with you to kill your smart ass. Right? Or is that like, a guarantee you'll be fine?

[kingmakereffect]

It's a guarantee I won't die to any disease, at least.

Though there is a rule in place about harming me, remember?

[penduli]

Some of the notes people have found aren't in your handwriting. I'm pretty sure they don't belong to any of us either, but they had to be written by someone.

[ ...he's basically just asking for confirmation. ]

So?

[captainobnoxious]

I do. But who's actually going to listen to that once they've got you in their hands, huh? It's more like a courtesy to ask and then clock you.

[Which she'd do. She'd absolutely ask to fight him and, if accepted, get ready to put a knife through his eye.]

[kingmakereffect]

You don't really expect me to hand you any answers, do you?

[kingmakereffect]

Well yes, I figure you all want a piece of me. But if you attack me without permission... well, the rule is in place for a reason.

[captainobnoxious]

For our own protection, yeah yeah, we've seen that much. Though how strong are you really if you have to have all this space between us and can only kill us if we're sleeping?

... Or want it, in the bird's case. I hope he was tasty at least. Can't say I know much more if you'd still blow up whoever was in the kitchen at the time, awake or not.

[penduli]

Are you that entertained by the idea of me just assuming things?

[kingmakereffect]

I didn't eat him, that's gross.

[JEEZ SIGRUN]

You're not getting an answer about how strong I am. But you knew that already, didn't you?

[kingmakereffect]

Maybe, maybe not.

[#helpful]

[captainobnoxious]

Well, you should've! That's a waste of a perfectly good bird if you didn't! I mean, talking aside, he's still just a bird!

[... She seemed genuinely upset by that. Ahem.]

But I ask a lot of questions I don't expect an answer out of, yeah. It's always fun to see which ones get a hit and which ones miss, though for this one I'm just gonna assume you're the type of person who stays in the corner during a fight.

[penduli]

[ OHHHHHHHHH my GODDDDDD ]

Were you born an asshole, or did your life experiences shape you into one? Just curious, it won't come up at the next meeting or anything like that.

[kingmakereffect]

[BUT THE KING, SIGRUN.........]

That's not important for you to know. Maybe it will be at some point, but for now you're not getting an answer.

[kingmakereffect]

I think I've always been this infuriating. Look at that, you got an answer.

[oh my god]